Today’s song is very important as it has a lot to do with why I call myself a hermit.

When I was five years old, I was taken to a speech pathologist. Apparently, I wasn’t talking a lot and my parents were concerned.

I do remember a brief moment of the interview. The women wore shoes with heels. She took off one of her shoes and held it up and asked, “What is this?” I answered, “A shoe.”

Now here was a defining moment of my life. I thought I said, “A shoe.” I heard the words come out of my mouth. But when I answered, the women said, “No, it’s a shoe.”

(long pause)

Yes, that’s how I felt.

So, today’s song is “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” as sung by Santa Esmeralda.

Being the good little boy that I was and having been taught never to argue with adults or answer back, I said nothing. Perhaps it was because I was such an introvert, or intimidated, or whatever, but I couldn’t – didn’t – say, “But that’s what I said!”

I don’t know what the lady told my parents. As usual, if I ask my mother today, she’ll say it was because my father wasn’t paying any attention to me, as if he were the only adult who had any influence on my life. So I don’t know what was wrong with me, and I was never given any speech lessons or went to the pathologist again.

A child with a problem which was never fixed. Clearly, I had a perception problem. I thought I said something completely logical and correct. It sounded right to me, but the person I was talking to didn’t understand me.

And that’s how it is to this day. I seem to always be misunderstood. Not only in the things I say, but the way I say them.

If someone is talking, and I want to reply to their comment, I try to answer, but I end up interrupting. If everyone has stopped talking around me and I say something, I often get glared at as if people are saying, “WTF.”


At the same time, I’ve been on stage, I’ve given speeches – I even won a speech contest in eight grade and was chosen to do the readings at mass in high school. So it really blows my mind that people don’t understand me.

This is a real problem in my life, and I believe one of the major reasons I’ve never felt at ease around people. It’s caused a lot of pain and embarrassment.

Someday, I may be able to get back to a speech specialist. But I’m getting too old to change my ways.

In some ways, I like being different. Being a hermit, I have a completely different perspective on life. I’ve been able to stand back and watch things that others aren’t able to because they are too involved with each other.

Of course, I could just be misunderstanding it all, but my intentions are good.