BobMoran.com

The 30 Day Music Challenge continues.

I’ve looked at other blogs where the writers just name the song. They do not give any explanation or talk about it at all. Others, like me, try to explain why the song is relevant to the day’s topic. Still more, including me again, hope to learn more about themselves by doing this.

However, this exercise has happened at about the same time in my life where I’ve decided not to explain myself to others, so it’s been strange for me. I want to stop defending myself and my feelings and ideas, yet here I am, participating in an activity that promotes explanation and exploration.

Yet, this is the place where I want to explain myself. My blog is the place where I hope people will get to know me better and understand why I am who I am. So I’m not about to just make a list of unrelated songs and post them here.

I realize that not a lot of people are going to read this. Who really wants to wade through pages and pages of ramblings of someone they don’t know. So I really need to find a common thread to all of this. At least then, I’d be able to post some ads and sell something, right?

Okay, enough stalling. I’ve gone on rambling this long because I know that today’s song and the reasons for my posting it under today’s topic may possibly cause an uproar.

If you know me, you know I will go to that place – the place where few are brave enough to go. As a hermit, and a philosopher, I travel to areas many fear, that many feel are taboo. But again, if you know me, you know that I am honest and try to base everything on truth, and much of my life has been about trying to figure out the truth.

As a child, I was very religious. Going to Catholic school for 13 years probably helped support that devotion. There were times when I thought I would become a priest, and I even won the Religion Award at my eight grade graduation and earned a religion medal in the scouts.

It wasn’t as if I was a fanatic, though. I wasn’t just a Catholic, I was a Christian. My sister and brother and friends attended Vacation Bible School at a Presbyterian Church. My boy scout troop held its meetings at a Methodist Church. I had Jewish relatives. So I had a chance to see other denominations and religions and had no hatred or bad feelings about any of them.

Hmmm, perhaps I am still stalling.

The point of all this is that I am no longer a child, and I am no longer religious. I am now an atheist and have been since about the age of 20 or 21.

So how does this relate to the music challenge?

Well, the change in philosophy and mind set would naturally create a change in the music I enjoy. I do still love a lot of hymns. Many religious songs still bring me a feeling of peace, simply because they are written to do that.

But the song I mention today also involves what I call fanatical patriotism, which I mentioned on my July 4th blog. Let me be clear. I don’t mind patriotism. I like to think I still have a touch of love for my country.

I also don’t mind someone who believes in God and has faith. But to carry either to an extreme or to feel either strongly, but blindly, without ever having questioned why one does, to me, is a terrible thing. And then, to go on and sing a song with such strong emotion and conviction, thinking that nothing is stronger or more right, bothers me.

Of course, I’ve never felt the need to go with the crowd. I don’t feel that group mentality that takes over during things like religious ceremonies or sporting events. It is a part of being a hermit.

Are you still reading? Boy, you are determined.

Okay, so the song I’ve picked for today’s topic – A song I use to love but now hate – is “God Bless America.”

No matter how you feel about this, leave a comment. Let’s open a dialogue. I doubt most will. It’s one of those taboo areas.

Today’s song is very important as it has a lot to do with why I call myself a hermit.

When I was five years old, I was taken to a speech pathologist. Apparently, I wasn’t talking a lot and my parents were concerned.

I do remember a brief moment of the interview. The women wore shoes with heels. She took off one of her shoes and held it up and asked, “What is this?” I answered, “A shoe.”

Now here was a defining moment of my life. I thought I said, “A shoe.” I heard the words come out of my mouth. But when I answered, the women said, “No, it’s a shoe.”

(long pause)

Yes, that’s how I felt.

So, today’s song is “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” as sung by Santa Esmeralda.

Being the good little boy that I was and having been taught never to argue with adults or answer back, I said nothing. Perhaps it was because I was such an introvert, or intimidated, or whatever, but I couldn’t – didn’t – say, “But that’s what I said!”

I don’t know what the lady told my parents. As usual, if I ask my mother today, she’ll say it was because my father wasn’t paying any attention to me, as if he were the only adult who had any influence on my life. So I don’t know what was wrong with me, and I was never given any speech lessons or went to the pathologist again.

A child with a problem which was never fixed. Clearly, I had a perception problem. I thought I said something completely logical and correct. It sounded right to me, but the person I was talking to didn’t understand me.

And that’s how it is to this day. I seem to always be misunderstood. Not only in the things I say, but the way I say them.

If someone is talking, and I want to reply to their comment, I try to answer, but I end up interrupting. If everyone has stopped talking around me and I say something, I often get glared at as if people are saying, “WTF.”

At the same time, I’ve been on stage, I’ve given speeches – I even won a speech contest in eight grade and was chosen to do the readings at mass in high school. So it really blows my mind that people don’t understand me.

This is a real problem in my life, and I believe one of the major reasons I’ve never felt at ease around people. It’s caused a lot of pain and embarrassment.

Someday, I may be able to get back to a speech specialist. But I’m getting too old to change my ways.

In some ways, I like being different. Being a hermit, I have a completely different perspective on life. I’ve been able to stand back and watch things that others aren’t able to because they are too involved with each other.

Of course, I could just be misunderstanding it all, but my intentions are good.

Need I say it again? I don’t like rap. I don’t like songs that discuss the dark side of life like going to jail.

Yet, I like Beautiful Girls by Shawn Kingston.

Why do I like this song? Maybe it’s the reggae influence; it has enough melody to keep me happy. I’ve listened to a couple of Shawn’s other songs and I was not interested.

I discovered this song as a background track on a YouTube video. I can’t remember which one. I want to say it was either about one of the Morning Musume girls or Magibon.

There are other songs about jail that I like now that I think about it. Jailhouse Rock by Elvis, Tie a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Old Oak Tree by Tony Orlando and Dawn, and the Cell Block Tango from Chicago come to mind. Hmmm, I may need to revise my list of dislikes.

The song I have picked for today is completely innocent. It’s bright, fun, cheerful, and beautiful. When I listen to it, I feel energetic and happy. Yet, the happiness is over-shadowed by a feeling of guilt, so I believe the song can be called a guilty pleasure.

Why do I feel guilt? Because this society of ours has determined that a man cannot enjoy anything about young girls or women without associating it with sex – not only sex, but a perverse, dirty kind of sex. Guess what – society is wrong.

I could go on trying to explain my feelings about this and why I like this song, but as I am nearing my 50th birthday (a link to my wish list is on the right under Bob’s Links, hint, hint), I have decided to stop explaining myself to others. If you don’t like me or how I think, too bad.

Anyway, I suppose I will still feel guilty, even if there is no good reason for it.

My song for today is “School Days” by Guardians 4. It is connected with a Japanese anime and the group singing it is connected to Hello! Project, the super group to which Morning Musume is a part. Mitsui Aika, the leader of Guardians 4, is a member of Morning Musume.

If I want to listen to this song, I will. If I want to watch the video, I will. I don’t, but if I wanted to watch the anime, I would. And I don’t have to explain it to anyone. If you find something wrong in all this, I suggest you question your own thoughts and ideas. We are what we think. I’m thinking happy thoughts and enjoying the music.

★ ★ ★ Happy ★ Fourth ★ of ★ July ★ ★ ★

I have a few topics to cover today, so this post will do some multitasking. WARNING! Some of the content may be offensive to Metal Heads and Nationalists (fanatical patriots).

Day 12 – A Song From a Band I Hate

Again, trying to choose one particular band I hate is worse than trying to pick a favorite. All I can really do is randomly pick a band from the type of music I dislike and randomly pick one of their songs. I came up with “A Touch of Evil” by Judas Priest.

If I have to explain the reasons for my not liking either the band or the song, you haven’t been reading my blog. Shame on you! You need to go back and catch up.

The Fourth and Patriotism

I haven’t really celebrated the Fourth in a long time. That is mostly due to my circumstances. In the future, I hope to be running shows or having BBQ’s or taking part in parades.

Personally, I am not as patriotic as I was as a child. Being patriotic is alright, but I see a lot of nationalism, which is worse. I don’t think nationalism is healthy. In many ways it is like religion – people take a lot on blind faith, they get fanatical.

It is nothing but chance that anyone is born in a particular country, and to think that your country is that much better than any other does nothing more than separate you from the rest of the world. It’s the same as thinking that your race, religion or looks make you better than someone else. It’s human nature, so it is understandable to feel that way, but acting on it is not the right thing to do.

I am proud of the United States for the good it does, and I think is could be a great country, but given the past decade politically, I do not feel as proud as I once did.

And yes, for those of you who get all offended and say silly things, I have thought about moving to another country. Not because you are offended by me, but because of the possible opportunities. Plus, to intimidate someone into leaving the country because of their opinion, to me, is un American. After all, we’re supposed to have the freedom to state our views no matter what.

There is as much opportunity and freedom in most of the developed world today as there is in the U.S. To deny that is the same as denying global warming or evolution. It’s just the way it is whether you want to see it or not.

I’ll stay in the U.S., but I’ll point out its problems and try to fix them, instead of just saying it’s the best country and waving a flag. If you complain about the Government remember this – you are the Government. The United States is ruled by the people. If it has problems – war, high taxes, a bad health care system, a broken educational system, etc. – it is our fault, because we are the rulers.

Our problems won’t be fixed until we unite and fix them. The more we divide ourselves into red vs blue, Texan vs New Jersey vs Hawaii, Christian vs Atheist vs Muslim, etc., native born vs immigrant… the worse it’s going to get. The people who believe they are in power will stay in power and you will just deal with it.

I’m a Published Playwright (Kinda)

I put my first play up for sale on the Theatre-for-Children.info website yesterday. I hope it’s the beginning of a new sourse of income and that it will be useful and fun for some non-profit theatre groups.

The script is titled “The Elf With the Weird Name” and is an audience participation one act. I actually wrote the original version just after I worked at Sesame Place. It was inspired by the Circle Players there.

Does this mean I’m a published playwright now? Or does that happen when the first person buys the script? Or does it count at all since I’m self publishing? Does it matter? I should write a play about it.